It's 2011: Happy New Year !!!

Hmm, What is my new year resolution going to be??? Let's see:

1. Lose weight
2. Drink plenty of water
3. Eat chawanprash
4. Never skip meals
5. Go to temple regularly
6. Stop fighting with everyone
7. Save more money and less of shopping
8. Talk less
9. Eat less chocolates and chips
10. Be more disciplined
11. Never share any food with monsters like Vamsi
12. Be more patient
13. Listen to my mom and J
14. Be more girlie
15. Be constructive - start piano classes, improve my writting, learn new words and softwares.

The list is too big...

What about you??? What's your list or resolution for this year?

Yay !!!! Back to slumber time !!!

Flashing news on the incompetence of Indian law in nabbing criminals has once again been the highlight of many news channels. As each day brings more news on our frail system and top notch corruption, my understanding has led to ponder if the common person is taken for a dummy. Latest eye-catcher was of course the Aarushi case, death of a 14yr teenager in 2008.

BI:
What lit this case were a number of accusations by the police, then CBI, to prove the law wasn’t sleeping. The young girl named Aarushi Talwar was alone at home when her dentist parents left for a party. On their return, they did not check on her that night and went off to bed. Next morning of course, was a shocker when they discovered her dead body. The list of accusations started from the house servant of Nepalese origin whose body was found on the terrace, the next day; the parents as they ‘it seems’ had found their daughter and servant in a compromising situation; peers of the servant and so on….. Finally, the CBI spills out its beans – they didn’t have any suspects and no one to accuse. Phew!!!

It is disappointing and fulsome to find you cannot find a culprit even with an enormous change in technology, DNA & fingerprinting methods and many more. While I watch serials like CID, CSI and others where justice always prevails in the end, the reality is quite the contrary. Then again, I remind myself over and over again on the zillions of cases which are pending in court, cases of innocents being thrown behind the bars, cases of criminals walking free after spending few years in prison or granted bail only to find them free forever because “someone” did not collect enough evidence. Towards the rotten end, all I could do was, pen down my thoughts here.

Question: If you had to change something about the law and order or want to talk in general about it, or would like to share your views on this case, feel free to post your comments here.

You break you lose, you fight you win!!!

I am a person like you. I love everything life is offering me, the warmth of my parents, supporting kinship of my siblings, chit-chattering with peers and the love or hope of the love of that x person I am destined to be with. The joy of being free from insecurities, the feeling of a fleeting eagle in higher skies looking at all the miniature dwellers around me, the changing weather from sparkling droplets of water to golden rays of sun peeping through groups of white cloud, the patterns of frequency from the early chirps of a sparrow nearby to the hip-hops or pop, the changing life from manual to electronic to liberation, so many more…. just rekindles the joy of being alive and being me!

With curious eyes, I watch and learn books of knowledge through text, wisdom and experience. The pumping heart within skips not just one, but many beats to find something new, a new meaning in life or a new adventure. There is so much to see, absorb and execute but I realize that I am not entitled to deliver anything, shine amidst the hundreds of power who overcast their dominance by sheer actions and/or verbs. I am in a world of hypocrisy and nothing can be done even when the revolution ‘MODERNIZATION’ has begun! Soon, I find my name to a list of age old cases of physical abuse and harassment.

Am I to trust you or can I trust you? Years of being together can suddenly stomp your trust. People around you look like vultures lining to scavenge your tiny self. Those known to you are the ones to pierce your soul in ambush and you thought you know everything so well!!! Trusting strangers has been a cause of concern but why those who you know? Was it something in me that steered a reaction of lustful strike of seconds or minutes? Where did I falter in exhibiting my emotions? Everyone around seem to think I initiated this or point a finger on my face or is it simply because I am a woman. It’s a slap on my integrity without attributing an ounce of scorn to the one who imbibed this feeling. I see two sets of people talking about me pretending that nothing has happened, as if I wasn’t the topic of discussion. What they don’t see is that I can see them too. Their actions are evident. While one set empathizes my current state of mind and experience, others mock at it. I am no more than a scoop never to die out as this will linger onto my existence till the very end. Forgetting it will not be easy as no one really wants me to forget. Why don’t they see what you give others comes back in a bigger form? Not that I would like anyone to go through the same but if you cannot sympathize or empathize a victim of harassment, don’t judge them and hit them daily with your questioning eyes. I am all alone right now. This is my battle and I understand it but I have not given anyone the rights to speak on my behalf. Moreover to all those who think I can be overpowered with your taunts, I will not back down.

I might have lost something ‘that day’ but gained a fresher outlook of confidence and strength today. I am a much wealthier person of power. To those who dismiss my agony through their ill attitude, well I am very much in control here. My dignity is very VERY much retained as it was and it is you who has lost it on my journey. Still, even to the one who brought this to me and to you all, I forgive you and pity you. You did not break me but made me the ‘ameliorated me’. I still have my family, close friends and all those who matter or whom I matter to, with me.

Watch out for the best now... here I come!!!

(This is dedicated to one of my dear friend who has been an inspiration to women of harassment. The one day of pain and humiliation has not put her down. She continues to fight her battle and we are all proud of her. If you have been hurt, don’t give up. Life is too precious to exhaust it. You are not alone and taking a tragic step will leave your parents living a meaningless life. Just don’t give up!!!)

Stumped: Aki and Moi

5th Dec, 2010 - Morning:

Back to a new Sunday and I am stumped!!! While the sky has been surprisingly kind with its nonstop showers and shades of grey, my mind has been juggling between so many thoughts – Go to Sleep like the ‘so many others’ or head to my most favourite place where the changing tides love hitting the shore with all its strength, where you find nothing but water, water and only salt water, where you find yourself in front the mighty Indian Ocean as one of the thousand admirers of its wonder – The Marina Beach.

Chillness seems to have crept inside the house and the surrounding has been nothing but desirable and lovely. Hmm, what is it that could be done at this moment? Eat freshly baked Australian Cookies from Cookie Man or piping hot Masala vadas or Pakodas and fall into a peaceful slumber or just may be....venture into the arms of inviting skies. Phew!!!

Evening:

Am back folks after a nice bath by the almighty ‘Indra’. Yes, I went out. My friend and I finally ventured into the arms of the inviting skies. As they turn on their sprinklers, speeding cars with lunatic drivers give us a free mud pack/ bath. Amidst the confusion and low visibility, we ride on a pretty Activa through the busiest roads in dear Chennai all the way to beloved Marina waiting anxiously for our arrival. We are in, parking our vehicle near the 4 wheelers to find a handful of crazy bunch like ourselves. As we head, our eyes take a turn towards the lady making roasted corn or bhutta’s in the rain. Yum, rain and hot corn is a deadly desirous combination and we got ourselves one. Biting the niblets coated with masala, walking slowly on the hardly seen sand, we shiver and squeak.

In front of the water and I see the gushing white water in full throttle. Famished and angry, she hits us and the drifting sands again and again and it felt sooooooooo good. The warm water was nothing less than nectar to a busy bee for our numb feet. Our cheeks had been frozen from the long ride and continuous downpour. Still, the hormonal rush within kept us warm. Watching the unending splendid sea was a tear jerker, reminding me of all the times I had been there talking to it. Small as an ant, I could have been easily crushed and taken away but I stood firm. Contemplating over my actions and then suddenly turn my focus to just enjoying ‘jumping’ and ‘screaming’ a zillion times till we left them behind. This day for me would definitely be one of the most adventurous events in my life – away from home so late, riding in the rain continuously that too doubles, standing right in front of a growling sea... I (We) truly loved it.

Rain rain don’t go away,
Come here almost everyday !!!